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Oh dear, I feel for you.

But, I must ask, why are you doing her laundry and picking up after her? it's one thing if doing it is going to make ou feel better. I on the other hand would LOVE it if my room mate would let me pick up after her, but she won't. But, it doesn't sound like it is making you feel better. So...don't pick up after her anymore. Just stop. Let her spend her trust fund sending off her laundry and such. And in the mean time...I'd say move out - you are clearly suffering as a result of the mixed expectations you guys have. Also - you shouldn't be going into her room at all even if it is to clean - and she shouldn't be going into yours either. Those are your private areas...that's a thought...

Hope that helps and good luck!!