10 Essential Items for Your Man CaveMarch 11th, 2010 by Staff Writer
For many guys, a well-stocked and lockable man cave is a necessity. Decorate the room yourself, asking for help or allowing your wife or girlfriend to do so guarantees that the room will not be a man-cave at all, but rather some womanly idea of what a man cave should be. There are 10 essential items to properly outfit your man cave to ensure women will be disinterested in walking through the door and that you’ll have everything you need.
The purpose of a man cave, after all, is to watch anything but reality TV, ice skating, or other ridiculous shows without interruption. When it comes to the television, bigger is better, and if you want to avoid ridicule, it must also be a flat screen, preferably hung on the wall.
2. Refrigerator and/or Bar
No TV is complete without a ready supply of drinks available nearby. While not every space may accommodate a freestanding full-service bar, a refrigerator is the minimum. Don’t skimp and put in your old college dorm fridge. Not only will you look ridiculous, but those tiny things can’t hold enough beer at all.
A man cave is private, enough said. You might not be able to lock it without drawing some fire from your family, but at the very least you need to be able to close the space off, even if it’s just to prevent anyone entering when you’re not there.
Where else are you going to sit? The deeper, the softer, the older, the sofa the better. Leather is always appreciated, too. You may want to add a la-z-boy to the room’s furniture, but you need to have a place to lie down.
You might not have one attached to the room, but if possible use a bathroom not shared by anyone else, especially girlfriends, kids or wives. Make sure it’s nearby; you don’t want to miss too much TV in the trek. The toilet seat should be raised at all times.
6. Poster of Rules
While you might not mind calling others out on their stupid behavior, it’ll get old to keep repeating yourself. Get a sign printed so others are on notice of the rules without you having to constantly say them. Get it printed and don’t make it yourself or have your kids make it.
7. Neon Signs
Any type of sign is permitted, but it should preferably be of a brand of beer or a humorous one. A story behind its acquisition makes it even better, and sarcasm is always appreciated.
Xbox 360, PSP, PS3, Wii, pinball or video will all be enjoyed by those you deem worthy to enter your man cave. It should be unnecessary to state that more than one game is necessary.
If you like cigars, have multiple types and brands available. If you and your group are cigarette smokers, have ashtrays or an easily accessible door to the outdoors available if you or your house is non-smoking.
Yeah yeah yeah, you can say whatever you want about respect and women’s lib, but stripper poles are hot. And you know you and your friends are going to mess around on the thing. Just have the address of the local hospital ready for when one of them falls and breaks an arm.
The main rule for your man cave is to do it right or don’t do it at all. If you can’t spend a lot of money, pick and choose what you can afford and only decorate with those things. Be chill about the process, and don’t invite or encourage any opinions about what your room needs.